Thursday, October 9, 2008

Super Radioactivce Man!

I have decided that I am now a super hero... as per the United States Customs Department...

Diletta and I decided to take Isabella across the border to do some shopping in the States today. We drove through the tunnel, it wasn't too busy, maybe 4 cars in front of us in lane 9. When it was our turn, I saw the gate go down...great I thought, it is going to take a while. Then I saw another gate go down, then another, then about 5 more - All gates went down? What they hell? Shift change at 11:45 - seems odd? Then I see a bunch of agents come out of the main building behind the booths...ah yes, shift change. Then I see more agents come out of the booths and a bunch start walking out into the cars with little gadgets in their hands. What are they doi.....ohhhhhh.....shit. They start walking towards our car as it clicks in with me...I have set off the radioactive detector...ahahhahaha...shit. An agent walks over to our car and asks if anyone has had a medical test lately...I say yes and he leaves...All the gates are still closed.

A different agent comes back to me ... they let the car in front of me go, then he directs me to drive to the next agent, who directs me to drive to the next agent, who directs me to drive to the next agent really slowly and then I have to drive through another detector. Then, back under the bay where I am told to park my car and turn it off and put the keys on the dash board...The ask all 3 of us to get out and go inside. We go in and they have a bigger contraption that they point at me and take some readings...she looks at me funny...does it again...and again. Then she brings in the supervisor who does the same thing...they then ask me to come into the back room where they do it again, and again and again. They ask a few questions and test me again...They tell me that I am testing positive for blah blah 99 blah blah - I say ya that is what the nurse told me I was injected with. He said that I am also testing positive for uranium so they can't let me go yet...he has a protocol he has to follow (by the way...they are all extremely nice to us - very nice - I was very surprised at this). Then another agent comes in and asks how much longer they have to hold the cars...hahahahah...the gates are STILL down...hahahaha ... oops. Poor bastards waiting in line to get to the states...I can remember numerous times when I was pissed because the border appeared to be closed for a coffee break!

They apologized to us as we left, I asked if there was anything I should do in the future if I had to come across after some tests, they said no, this is just the protocol and it would happen the exact same way any time this happened. They apologized again...

Hence - Super Radioactive Man - He can close borders!

P.S. Gallium Scan tomorrow at 7:30am then off to the cottage...I likely won't write until we get back on Monday maybe Tuesday after my port surgery.

Have a great Thanks Giving everyone!

Jeff (Super Radioactive Man) Casey


Raddy said...

Mr. Radioactive Man, keep up the great work, kick the shit outta that cancer! You have been in our thoughts down here in Aus. We hope to meet the new edition when we're home for Xmas, keep up the good work! Richard + Wendy

KJR said...

Oh my God, that is ssssssssssoooooooo funny!!!!!!!!! I never knew they have those kind of controls. Luckily they didn't cavity search you! hahahaha.

Dora and Dave said...

Hi Jeff,

Sorry I didn't warn you about this. I actually teach this in my lecture about radioactivity and warn my students about it too.

Happy 1st Thanksgiving to Isabella and you and Diletta too.


One day at a Time said...

Hi there,
I just thought I would leave a comment to let you know that although I dont know you personally, I find your positive attitude towards this "bump in the road" so refreshing. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Thanks for providing us with a reminder of what's `really important accompanied with a sense of humour!

Anonymous said...

I remember being sent through one of those yellow detection arms at the Buffalo border. I have no idea why i set off the same machine, but it was pretty cool getting to do all the tests to pass the US border. In Canada they just get a dog to snif your ass.